“I don’t care how you get here, just get here if you can”

-Oleta Adams

When I read this article, those lyrics and the accompanying melody popped into my head.

Now they will be in yours all day! You are welcome.

Therapy is a process by which we are indeed trying to “get somewhere”, and how we get there is as diverse as people.

These researchers explored biological, structural mechanisms of action which I found super interesting, but if you are not a nerd like me, perhaps you prefer a more succinct and applicable summary:

Some folks over index on feelings, some folks under appreciate how their emotions are driving distress in their lives…ketamine helps both types work in therapy to heal.

After just saying people are diverse, I want you to think about two “groups”.

The OVER indexers:

You know those big plastic tubes that people stand in, that are full of cash, and they turn on the blowers in the floor, and the cash blows all over the place and people grasp and claw and try and catch the money flying around in the tube with them?

That is what living “emotions first” feels like. I feel therefore I am! It might sound great…but it can feel like shit.

Are you having your feelings, or are your feelings having you?

This can take different shapes depending on other factors. These can be the drama/chaos/conflict folks on your team at work, in your family, at your house of worship. These can be the highly compassionate, caring, generous people volunteering at your local non-profit. These are ALWAYS toddlers 😉

When emotions are viewed as directives, not data points to be interrogated-its drives suffering.

Therapy is a journey to “get somewhere else”. That somewhere can be a skill set! Learning to pause, explore, examine the origin story of the feeling, if it is proportional or accurate. Perhaps the feeling is a fair and reasonable response to trauma or harm-but when it gets cemented as a trait, or embraced as an identity, we miss the opportunity to see “feelings” as a state of being that is mutable, changeable.

Ketamine allows for cognitive distance for folks struggling with this. We use it to create space between the emotion/feeling/affect and the persons sense of self. Honoring the experiences as real is important! It just may not be accurate, proportional, or (gasp) the most important thing happening on the planet at the moment!

The OVER intellectualizers:

Me: How do you feel about this?

Client: I have meetings set up and I trust my team.

Me: What are the emotions that come up for you about this?

Client: I think he is competent and the timeline is aggressive.

Me: What does it feel like when you talk about it?

Client: I want to make sure I am doing all I can to support them.

Me: So, I have asked you how you feel three times and you have told me things you THINK. Let us try this again. Place your hand on your chest. Sit for ten seconds. How do you FEEL? What is the emotion-one word-that kicks up for you?

Fear.

This probably comes up the most in my client base.

In fact, I have had many clients  literally look at me and say “I don’t feel fear”, and then promptly share all kinds of “thinking things” that are functional denial-lol.

Anger. Resentful. Ashamed. Abandoned. Betrayed. Alone.

Those are my other frequent fliers.

Listen, I do NOT want people wandering around wallowing in affect…I actually think it is a cultural catastrophe and a well-intended but misguided message we have sent to kids (how you “feel” is the most important thing, or that certain affective experiences like anxiety are “dangerous”), but the opposite is a terrible overcorrection, and THAT is killing us too.

The “Fuck your Feelings” flag is the most emotional flag out there!?!

Rage is a feeling fellas!

Sigh.

If we do not name our feelings, we cannot tame them. We cannot behave forward in spite of them, they are going to drive us and usually not wisely.

Ketamine Infusion Therapy has been an accelerant for my work with clients around this end of “getting there” too.

So! We don’t care how you get to us, but get to us if you can.

We look forward to helping you see the world beyond the given.